Dear GYE,
I am in a horrible predicament. I discovered that my father
(a talmid chacham, a big baal chesed) is looking at ervah on our filtered Internet. We are a “regular” frum family. Please, please, I need advice about what steps to take. I have no idea what to do, and I can’t have anyone know about this.
With much hakaras hatov in advance.

Rabbi Twerski Responds

I spoke with my posek, who said that there is no kibbud av problem here, as long as the child approaches her father gently and respectfully.

“Tatty (or Abba):
“It hurts me to talk to you about this [she’ll probably cry when she does this], but I know you’ve been viewing things on the Internet that are not l’fi kevodcha. I love you, and I respect you, and I want to be able to continue doing so.

“At this point, you cannot stop without help. If you do not receive help, it will progress and will be a terrible bushah for you and the whole family.

“Effective treatment is available without fear of exposure. Please don’t tell me that you will stop on your own. It can’t be done.”

She can then put him in contact with Guard Your Eyes, me, or anyone you suggest.